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by Dan Savage
I’ve been happily married to my wife for fifteen years. I’m a 54-year-old man, she’s a 55-year-old woman. While sex has never
been our strongest suit, we’ve made the effort. But she now finds sex too painful and no longer wants to have intercourse. I’m on the larger side, which may or may not be relevant. She’s still willing to do oral sex, which we do maybe once a month. I don’t want to go without intercourse for the rest of my life and have told her as much. Recently, in couples therapy, I proposed opening things up in a variety of ways, all of which she refused to do, saying it would cause her shame and that she’s too afraid it would lead to me falling for someone else. I sort of feel like we’re at a dead end. I love her and our life and our teenage kid…
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