Want more Jeff Edelstein? Head over to jeffedelstein.substack.com Why is it that when Americans — well, at least this American — hears a British accent, we think they’re smart, but the opposite, I’m sure, does not hold true? And not all British accents, mind you. I hear a Cockney accent, I d on’t think I’m dealing with an Einstein. But I hear a person talking in the Queen’s English, I’m ready to let them manage my affairs. This is completely nuts, by the way. I know this. You know this. But here we are. I think it goes back to childhood. Every smart cartoon character had a British accent. Every evil genius in movies? British. Every narrator of a nature documentary who’s explaining why zebras do whatever zebras do? British. Hell, even Siri sounds smarter when you switch her to British. We’ve been conditioned to think British equals brainy. It’s basically Pavlovian at this point. But let’s think about this logically for a second. If I meet some guy from Jersey named Tony, and he tells me something, then I meet some British guy named Nigel who tells me the exact same thing, I’m probably going to trust Nigel more. Even if Tony went to Princeton and Nigel dropped out of high school to become a professional tea taster or whatever. This cognitive bias makes zero sense. I mean, we fought a whole war to get away from these people. Twice, if you count 1812. And now I’m sitting here thinking they’re automatically smarter than us because they pronounce “schedule” like “shed-ule”? But it’s not even all British accents that do this to us. Scottish? Eh, not so much. Welsh? I can barely understand what they’re saying half the time. Irish? Fun to listen to, but I’m not asking them to do my taxes. It’s specifically that upper-crust English accent, the one that sounds like they went to fancy boarding schools and know which fork to use for the fish course. We don’t even have fish courses! That’s the one that makes me go all gooey. And you know what’s really messed up? I bet most British people with that accent are just as clueless about most things as the rest of us. They probably look at their own plumbing problems and think, “Well, bollocks, I have no idea what I’m doing here.” But put them on American TV talking about literally anything, and I’m ready to hand over my life savings. I think it comes down to cultural insecurity. We Americans like to think we’re tough and independent, but deep down, we’ve got this lingering inferiority complex about refinement and intellectual pedigree. Like we’re still the scrappy colonial upstarts who don’t know which fork to use during the fish course, and again, to be abundantly clear, we don’t even have fish courses. So when we hear that accent, the one that sounds like centuries of institutional authority, some part of our brain goes, “Oh, these people have figured things out. They know stuff.” Even though, realistically, they’re probably just as confused about life as we are. They just sound more elegant while being confused. The really crazy part? I bet if you flipped it around, British people hearing American accents probably think we’re all either cowboys or gangsters, which, depending on where you’re from in New Jersey, might not be entirely wrong. But they’re definitely not sitting there thinking, “Oh, an American accent! This person must be incredibly intelligent and sophisticated.” No, they’re probably thinking, “Oh great, another loud American who’s going to ask me where the nearest McDonald’s is.” And honestly? They’re probably not wrong about that either. So here we are, Americans getting all impressed by British accents while British people are probably rolling their eyes at ours. It’s like some weird cultural circle of judgment where nobody comes out looking good. But I’ll tell you what: The next time I hear someone with a fancy British accent trying to sell me something or give me advice, I’m going to remember this. I’m going to think, “Hold on, Jeff. Just because this person sounds like they’re smart doesn’t mean they actually know what they’re talking about.” Then again, they probably still know more than I do about most things. I’m a dummy. Bloody hell. ...read more read less