DEAR ABBY: Our daughter and son-in-law live with us. She’s painting the interior to update our 27-year-old house and wants to update the cabinets at her expense. Every time she tries to make things look better, her daddy gets angry and accuses her of trying to take over “his” house before he’s dead. (This is not true.) He says if you ask anyone, they would agree with him. I say he’s wrong. What do we do? -- SPRUCING UP IN INDIANA