If you went hard on the booze this past holiday season, don’t worry, because Dry January is here. It is a month of recovery from pinot grigio … but at R House in Wynwood, the party keeps going with bottomless mocktails. Top that! Is your January dry? Athena Dion: “I am celebrating Dry January this year.” Alex Miranda: “Lies.” Guest 1: “I’m about to take a little break and start my year off on a different note.” Guest 2: “I’m not. Sorry!” Athena Dion: “I didn’t say that it’s going well, but I am trying.” [Alex laughs.] Well, for those of you who are, R House in Wynwood has… Athena Dion: “A ton of options that you can enjoy with your friends who do drink alcohol and not feel left out of the party.” Not that you would, anyway, at this world-famous drag brunch. Guest 3: “There is no shortage of fun at R House, whether you’re drinking or not.” Four craft mocktails promise a premium experience. Athena Dion: “We have our Blanco Margarita, which is our mocktail take on the traditional.” Guest 1: “You can really taste the lime coming through, and the black salt? Chef’s kiss.” Guest 3: “All the perfect parts of the margarita without the little tingle at the end.” Alex Miranda: “Meanwhile, I thought the alcohol was the perfect part of the margarita. There’s also a smoky version of that as well.” Athena Dion: “The Smoky Mango Margarita: lime, mango and bee pollen, honey. It’s gonna get you up and going, baby.” Guest 4: “Very fruity, and you feel the spicy. I think I feel the alcohol.” Alex Miranda: “You think they messed the drink up? Maybe there is alcohol in there.” Guest 4: “Absolutely.” Athena Dion: “I love a man drinking an old fashioned. You know he is dignified, and there’s no exception when it comes to our non-alcoholic Pathfinder Old Fashioned.” Guest 5: “It did have the vibe and feel that I was drinking an actual cocktail.” Alex Miranda: “You were fooled?” Guest 5: “Yes.” Athena Dion: “We have our No-groni, so it’s everything you would expect.” Alex Miranda: “That’s so cute.” Athena Dion: “Isn’t it cute?” Alex Miranda: “I love the name.” Including… Athena Dion: “Martini Rose Floreal. What’s the [expletive] is this?!” Alex Miranda: “She’s reading right off the menu, y’all!” Athena Dion: I feel like this is Vitameatavegamin!” Athena Dion: “The drink is delicious, and I’m a fan of Negronis, and I couldn’t tell the difference.” But can you tell the difference in fun? Athena Dion: “I feel like Dry January gets a bad rep, like, you’re not going to have fun if you’re, like, sober. But I think there’s a lot of ways.” For example, if you get nervous to socialize sober, Athena says, ask a question. Athena Dion: “Have you been to R House to try the new mocktails lately?” Alex Miranda: “Hey! Have you guys heard about the new mocktails at R House??!!” Guest 2: “So, anyway…” For dancing, she recommends the leg, thrust and spin. Athena Dion: “Now, you’ll be doing that one alone.” But to flirt dry, it’s all in the eye. Athena Dion: “Give a little look. Give a little wink.” Alex Miranda: “What’s up?” Guest 4: “What?”¿Tienes algo en tu ojo?” (“Do you have something in your eye?”) Alex Miranda: “Uh, no…” Mocktails can also be ordered bottomless. Guest 3: “If you’re drinking, not drinking, this is the perfect place.” Mocktails start at $14. R House is open Wednesdays through Sundays. Their famous drag brunches are on Saturday and Sunday. They also have “RuPaul’s Drag Race” watch parties this season every Friday night at 8 p.m. FOR MORE INFO:R House Wynwood2727 NW 2nd Ave.Miami, FL 33127rhousewynwood.com